Dear Everyone,
Sex and love form important themes in my novel, “Gabriel’s Inferno.” The theme is developed through dialogue, events, the lives of the characters and even through a university lecture or two. My characters and the characters in the various pieces of literature mentioned in the story take different views on these topics.
Sometimes sex and love are separate considerations, sometimes they are unified. Sometimes sex is viewed as a gift to give someone else, sometimes it’s viewed as something taken from another person for one’s own benefit and pleasure. Sometimes sex is a way of exerting power or control over another person, sometimes it’s a way of asserting vulnerability and connectedness. Without offering spoilers, I’ll simply point out that the various voices in the novel express what I take to to be both typical and atypical approaches to the vexed questions of sex and love.
(Parenthetically it should be noted that although sex is a theme of my story, it isn’t the entire story. Readers have had varying reactions to that fact!)
Those familiar with Anglicanism and Thomas Cranmer’s “Book of Common Prayer,” (BCP) are no doubt familiar with the wedding vows used in Anglican weddings. Those vows have changed, as has the BCP. Nevertheless, the old words include an insight that I think provides an interesting way of viewing sex. This insight is included in “Gabriel’s Inferno” as part of a discussion between two of the characters.
“Then shall they again loose their hands; and the Man shall give unto the Woman a Ring, laying the same upon the book with the accustomed duty to the Priest and Clerk. And the Priest, taking the Ring, shall deliver it unto the Man, to put it upon the fourth finger of the Woman’s left hand. And the Man holding the Ring there, and taught by the Priest, shall say,
ITH this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”
ITH this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”Although the language has changed in recent versions of the BCP, such that “with my body I thee worship” is no longer a vow made from husband to wife, some Anglican couples (and priests) include the language anyway.
But what does it mean for the husband to vow to worship his wife with his body?
An early commentary by Dr. Anthony Sparrow argues that there are two meanings to this phrase. First, that the husband is indicating that the wife will be his legal wife and not his mistress or concubine. Thus, she will be given the benefits of his property and her offspring will be his legitimate children. Second, the idea of “worship” in this context is that of “honour.” The husband vows to honour his wife.
I’m sure Sparrow’s commentary has some merit. But the plain meaning of the text seems to indicate something else, as Bishop Paul Marshall argues. To use one’s body to worship another in the context of marriage, seems to refer to sex. And not simply “having sex,” but “making love.” The idea here is that through physical intimacy, the husband affirms his love and respect (and honour) for his wife. He gives to her; he doesn’t take from her. Viewing sex as an act of worship of another person takes the self-centredness out of it. Sex becomes something other than personal physical gratification (although physical pleasure is important); it becomes other-centred. Notice that the vow was made from husband to wife and not the reverse.
Why?
But there is something else behind these words that is not mentioned by either Sparrow or Marshall, and that is the connection between sex and the divine. In some religious traditions, sex is a means of worshipping a deity. In Greek and Roman times, for example, one could engage in sexual acts with temple prostitutes as a means of worshipping a particular god or goddess. But I’m not talking about that.
I’m referring to the the way in which sex transports a human being into something overwhelming and ecstatic and I’m suggesting that this transport offers a glimpse of the divine. It’s possible that this idea is captured by Cranmer’s vow. The act of worshipping another with one’s body, such that one is giving and not taking, such that one is other-centred, provides a context in which one can experience what it would be like to be loved completely and unreservedly. What it would be like to experience the satisfaction of all one’s deepest longings. What it would be like to have pleasure, bliss and happiness not just for an instant, but for eternity. In Cranmer’s context (as in Dante’s), this eternity would be had in the presence of God. Perhaps sex (when done in a worshipful way) is a glimpse, a shadow of what it would be to bask in the glory of God in Paradise, like Dante and Beatrice. As Dante expresses in his Paradiso, the universe is held together by love…
I know many of you have been wondering about the sequel to “Gabriel’s Inferno.” The sequel is in progress, but I don’t have a release date yet. When the release date is set by the publisher, we’ll be able to announce it here, on Twitter and on Facebook. Thank you for your continued support. It’s much appreciated.
All the best and thanks for reading,
SR
(For an interesting piece on Dante’s Paradiso click here.)
I am honoured to have had all three of my novels appear on the New York Times and USA Today Bestseller lists. I was a Semifinalist for Best Author in the 2011 and 2012 Goodreads Choice Awards. {